You must be wondering what we mean by "anger and hate is actually a positive trait"!
Allow us to explain. First we need to understand anger vs hate, and then we touch on how these traits are innate in us, but for good reason!
Hate vs. Anger
When we hate someone, we usually hate them because of what they are. This may be misdirected and what we really are 'angry' about, is anger towards them because of what they did. In this case, we 'hate' the situation.
For example, when we stop our kids from eating too much ice-cream or any other sweet treat, and they say 'I hate you!' they don't truly mean they hate us, instead they are angry at the fact that they cannot indulge endlessly in sweet treats and that a boundary is being set.
What is anger?
Where else when people are angry at someone, they often have the feeling that they can control the other person. Anger, essentially, is trying to remove the obstacle posed by the other person when you want to reach a goal.
For example, you get angry when you want an apology, when you want someone to change their behavior, etc.
Innately, we are 'good'
Here are some ways that display we are innately good, and mean well - it just has to be encouraged, and nourished.
- Children will naturally help each other because we crave authentic friendships and create close connections. Holding hands with someone alleviates fear.
- Smiling is a basic human instinct!
- We can be naturally empathetic (we just need to breed this in our environment, thinking, and communication).
- Kindness makes us feel happy!
How can kids use their anger for good?
Hate and anger at a situation can be used to contribute positively to a situation, for example, helping someone who might be upset or not feeling well. Perhaps sibling A hates when sibling B is sick, so they may be able to help you in taking care of them. Or, perhaps your little one hates and gets angry at animals being hurt, the Earth being littered. In another instance they may hate when someone takes their toys, so they learn to share politely or speak up for themselves in the right manner.
E.L.O. Deck Cards that Relate to this:
- I can be the change
- I have great ideas
- I am responsible for my actions
- I care for others
- I care for the earth
- Everyone has different tastes
- I love sharing